Starring: Matt Bomer as Guy Handsome, Jared Leto as Joe Handsome and Special Guest Star Rosario Dawson as the Goddess Pele. Truly Special Guest Starlet: Miss Piggy. With Shecky and Waldorf.
Someone had taken the magma red sign which said: 'Reserved Parking Pele Only' and had slipped a lavender silk bag over it which read, “Reserved Parking Pour Moi” instead. This made Pele narrow her eyes. The Palanquin in the space was also mostly lavender, with touches of pink rosettes and lace and some draped ropes of pearls.
“Uh oh.” Guy said to his brother, “looks like the Pig's goose is cooked.”
Joe was busy decorating his pedicab to make it suitable for the VIP client that had hired them both for a photo shoot and tour. She was actually really grabby, but at least she always wore lavender satin gloves, so it wasn't too, too bad. “Hopefully? Not before we get paid.”
Yes, this time Joe had put on a shirt. He had to. He had a video conference with his bosses and some clients back in Chicago, and they would not have understood him “going native” on them. Which was why His was the taxi getting the make-over.
Cut to commercial: Today's show is brought to you by the Coalition to explain that Brown and White Eggs Are The Same. BAWEATS reminds you: Shell color is not an indication of nutritional content. Aracana chicken actually lay turquoise eggs, and they are still chicken eggs as well.
“Ahem.” Pele said to the lavender clad porcine princess who exited the hotel just then.
“Ohhh!” Said the Piggy. “What pretty pretty Palanquin bearers vous have.” She batted her eyes. “And Red is SO your color.”
Pele found herself nonplussed, which didn't often happen. “Why, thank you,” She said.
“Alas pour moi,” Piggy continued, “I could not bring my usual bearers. It seems the Aloha State is nervous about foreign froggies!” She gestured toward the fantastically studly bearers taking the place of her standard crew, managing to toss her ample blond locks as she did so. “These... are... ad-eeee-quate.”
An old man and his nephew Shecky from New Jersey were sitting, eating and watching the conversation. The elder gentleman said, “Ha ha ha, adequate? She needs the whole WWF to carry that litter.”
“WWF?” Shecky said, “Uncle Waldorf, the World Wrestling Entertainment is now called WWE.”
“Ha ha ha.” Said the Uncle, “no, I meant the WWF – She need the World Winching Federation to lift her up!”
“The other one is hot though.” The nephew, Shecky from New Jersey sighed. “Smokin’ hot.”
Just then Guy had to run over with a fire extinguisher to douse the pig's floaty scarf, which Pele had ignited when it blew in her face.
“You have saved moi!” Miss Piggy said, falling into Guy Handsome's manly arms and kissing him. “I just loooooove Haaaaandsome BROTH-ers.” She cooed.
"First time I've seen a shirtless guy cure a pig from becoming a smoked sausage." Shecky commented to his Uncle, who replied: "Ha ha ha!"
Joe made himself look even busier decorating.
Soon the Handsome brothers pedaled away with Miss Piggy enjoying the breeze in Joe’s cab. Tossing her hair and breathing out murmurs of, “faster, faster pour moi!”
The nephew, Shecky from New Jersey, said, “Those guys must be Good Eggs.”
“Ha ha ha,” the Uncle chortled, then in unison they said: “They'd have to be very Good Eggs to manage go with so much HAM.”
Our next episode: When Changes Comes.
