Starring: Matt Bomer as Guy Handsome, Jared Leto as Joe Handsome and Special Guest Star Rosario Dawson as the Goddess Pele.
“Soon,” Guy said pointing to the calendar, where Joe's flight to Chicago was listed.
“I'll fly away, O! Glory! I'll fly away, on that morning! Yes, I'll fly, Hallelujah, by and by! I'll fly away!” Joe sang.
Pedaling furiously as as their fares were shouting about being late, Guy looked over at Joe and sang, “Some glad morning when this life is o'er...”
And Joe sang back, “I'll fly away?”
“To our home, on Chicago's Eastern shore!” Guy sang out.
“I'll fly away! I'll fly away!” Joe sang out.
Pele noted that something was... different about the Handsome brothers, and not just because when she was carried past them by her bearers that they began to sing.
“When the shadows of this life have gone,” Guys sang softly as Pele passed.
“I'll fly away?”
“Like a bird! From prison bars has flown!”
“ I'll fly away.”
“Fly away,” Guy made a ZZ Top gesture, implying the universal concept of 'outta here.'
Joe waved.
Cut to commercial: Brought to you by my Quilt Quest Stash! http://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc139/blazeorama/quilt%20quest/DSC02087.jpg
As they grilled a couple of fish they had caught for dinner, Joe sang softly: “I'll fly away, Oh Glory I'll fly away!”
“... on that morning! In the sky, Hallelujah, by and by...” Guy reminded his brother.
“I'll fly away!”
The next morning, they transported a family with four year old twins and a Newfoundland dog who needed drooling bibs, and the dog had weak bladder.
“Just a few more weary days and then, I'll fly away.” Joe whispered to his brother.
“Chicago land, where the Antics never end.” Guy teased him.
“I'll fly away!” Joe agreed. “I'll fly away.”
“Those two are up to something,” Pele mused aloud, mostly to the camera, “I just know it.”
29 June, 2011
19 June, 2011
Tonight's Episode: Sweeps
Starring: Matt Bomer as Guy Handsome, Jared Leto as Joe Handsome and Special Guest Star Rosario Dawson as the Goddess Pele
Pele, while frequently away of late, always came home for meetings of the Polynesian Voyaging Society. She especially liked the night meetings on the beaches far from urban light sources, and also the hikes up on Mauna Kea. (Although more than once in the past several decades she had been annoyed by prohibitions on palanquins during the hikes.)
The Polynesian peoples who had first settled her Islands were a great relief to her loneliness, yes, but in an historical retrospective they had also saved her from being reviled by later Christian settlers as a demon or worse as a virgin!
But mostly, Pele loved to listen to the people talk about the star swept sky.
The stars, she knew were great furnaces so far away that one could only see them as pin pricks of light in the obsidian blackness of space.
As the ocean breeze swept her hair and her flame colored mu-mu this way and that, she wondered what those long ago voyagers had felt, and wondered how, if they were afraid in the huge tracts of darkness that their ocean crossing required, they had managed to stay the course?
“Are you chilly?” Guy asked the woman looking at the stars, and offering her the blanket that he had brought along to sit on. He had it wrapped generously around her shoulders, not even realizing who was standing before him, as Pele was wearing one of her more aged avatars.
“Thank you.” She was now grinning, “but you must be cold! Why don't you go put a shirt on?” She waited for his reply. If she had expected complaint, or remonstration she was disappointed.
“No, that is okay, I come from Chicago, and it gets so cold there you can toss a cup of coffee into the air and it makes snow.” He followed her gaze. “It is great here, isn't it?”
Cut to commercial: Tonight's episode is brought to you by Christine's latest greatest quilt. http://i245.photobucket.com/albums/gg50/Marisol_29/Crafts/DSC03551.jpg
Joe came jogging up to his brother, and instantly wondered how, even with dozens of beautiful wahines around, he always ended up conversing with an older person. “Sup?”
“He was telling me how it can snow coffee in your homeland,” Pele replied. “And how you don't get cold here, even when it is chilly, like now.”
Joe laughed, “yes, to us? This isn't chilly!”
“So, why do you think the Polynesians came to this land?” She asked the brothers.
Joe was about to give a dozen sociological-economic reasons for undertaking such a voyage, when he suddenly looked at Guy and recalled something from their youth. “Just a little farther.” He whispered the phrase wistfully.
Guy chuckled. “Which is why people do anything. You climb on a rock, then you have to climb on a little bit bigger rock.”
“And if you have a brother? You have to climb a little higher than he climbed,” Joe explained.
“So then of course he has to climb a little higher than that,” Guy continued, “And if your Mom and Dad let you run ahead at the park? You want to go... just a little farther.”
“So eventually you end up on the moon,” Joe finished.
“Just a little farther?” Pele realized, “I feel like that about the ocean, and how far into it the land goes.”
Her disguise lifted and the brother's were a bit startled. They watched her sweep away, still holding their blanket around herself, like some ancient chieftain.
Pele, while frequently away of late, always came home for meetings of the Polynesian Voyaging Society. She especially liked the night meetings on the beaches far from urban light sources, and also the hikes up on Mauna Kea. (Although more than once in the past several decades she had been annoyed by prohibitions on palanquins during the hikes.)
The Polynesian peoples who had first settled her Islands were a great relief to her loneliness, yes, but in an historical retrospective they had also saved her from being reviled by later Christian settlers as a demon or worse as a virgin!
But mostly, Pele loved to listen to the people talk about the star swept sky.
The stars, she knew were great furnaces so far away that one could only see them as pin pricks of light in the obsidian blackness of space.
As the ocean breeze swept her hair and her flame colored mu-mu this way and that, she wondered what those long ago voyagers had felt, and wondered how, if they were afraid in the huge tracts of darkness that their ocean crossing required, they had managed to stay the course?
“Are you chilly?” Guy asked the woman looking at the stars, and offering her the blanket that he had brought along to sit on. He had it wrapped generously around her shoulders, not even realizing who was standing before him, as Pele was wearing one of her more aged avatars.
“Thank you.” She was now grinning, “but you must be cold! Why don't you go put a shirt on?” She waited for his reply. If she had expected complaint, or remonstration she was disappointed.
“No, that is okay, I come from Chicago, and it gets so cold there you can toss a cup of coffee into the air and it makes snow.” He followed her gaze. “It is great here, isn't it?”
Cut to commercial: Tonight's episode is brought to you by Christine's latest greatest quilt. http://i245.photobucket.com/albums/gg50/Marisol_29/Crafts/DSC03551.jpg
Joe came jogging up to his brother, and instantly wondered how, even with dozens of beautiful wahines around, he always ended up conversing with an older person. “Sup?”
“He was telling me how it can snow coffee in your homeland,” Pele replied. “And how you don't get cold here, even when it is chilly, like now.”
Joe laughed, “yes, to us? This isn't chilly!”
“So, why do you think the Polynesians came to this land?” She asked the brothers.
Joe was about to give a dozen sociological-economic reasons for undertaking such a voyage, when he suddenly looked at Guy and recalled something from their youth. “Just a little farther.” He whispered the phrase wistfully.
Guy chuckled. “Which is why people do anything. You climb on a rock, then you have to climb on a little bit bigger rock.”
“And if you have a brother? You have to climb a little higher than he climbed,” Joe explained.
“So then of course he has to climb a little higher than that,” Guy continued, “And if your Mom and Dad let you run ahead at the park? You want to go... just a little farther.”
“So eventually you end up on the moon,” Joe finished.
“Just a little farther?” Pele realized, “I feel like that about the ocean, and how far into it the land goes.”
Her disguise lifted and the brother's were a bit startled. They watched her sweep away, still holding their blanket around herself, like some ancient chieftain.
11 June, 2011
Tonight's episode: Beer and Skittles
Starring: Matt Bomer as Guy Handsome, Jared Leto as Joe Handsome and Special Guest Star Rosario Dawson as the Goddess Pele.
Guest Star: Neil Patrick Harris as Nathaniel Winkle
It has to be said, that even though afflicted with Pele's curse, and unable to go into the mainstream stores, those which proudly (or wickedly) display signs proclaiming: No Shirt No Shoes No Service, this did not decrease the Handsome brother's need for supplies and sundries. It caused them to investigate the virtues of the small business owner, who valued trade above wardrobe.
Winkle's was one of those stores where a shirtless man could indeed buy a gallon of milk, some bread, peanut butter and other goods to keep body and soul together. So it was that, when on their way to work early one morning, they saw Nat Winkle's truck under an underpass, they pulled their pedicabs over and asked, “heya, Natty, sup?”
Nathaniel Winkle, technically the eighth, called Natty to distinguish him from his father, who went by the moniker Nat-fish (neither brother had yet had the time and temerity to ask regarding this.)
“Damn hammer.” Natty was somewhat sooty and looked at them from behind his thick round glasses. His white deli coat showed some stress from being on the ground.
Joe knelt and looked. “Wow, you don't see that every day.” There was claw hammer that had impaled the right rear tire of the Winklemobile.
“It's like I am cursed. You can't imagine what it is like!” The younger Winkle exclaimed.
“You might be surprised,” Joe replied quietly.
Cut to Commercial: The Rhinecliff Hotel. http://www.therhinecliff.com/index.html So good!
Natty spread his hands in exasperation. “No matter where, no matter what, it is always a hammer.”
Pragmatic, Guy said, “have a jack? We can help you change the tire.” He peeked under the truck for the spare, “You have a flat spare.” He looked at Joe, “There is another hammer in it.”
“No way,” Joe’s voice was hushed.
“Way,” Guy nodded, truth being stranger than fiction.
Joe hunkered to look under the truck, “Look at that!'
“Hammer.” Natty sighed.
“No problem,” Guy said, “hop in the cab, and we'll take you to pick up a tire and bring you back.”
“First we should push you out from in the underpass, you can't believe how unsafe...” He didn't even get the words out when they heard a squeal of tires and crunching from above themselves! Down poured a familiar smelling golden liquid. On the other side of the underpass a sound like hail, or beads echoed.
“Even in the face of disaster, life can be all beer and skittles!” Natty stated and then shouted, “ow!” As a hammer dislodged from the I beam above them and landed on his foot.
Guest Star: Neil Patrick Harris as Nathaniel Winkle
It has to be said, that even though afflicted with Pele's curse, and unable to go into the mainstream stores, those which proudly (or wickedly) display signs proclaiming: No Shirt No Shoes No Service, this did not decrease the Handsome brother's need for supplies and sundries. It caused them to investigate the virtues of the small business owner, who valued trade above wardrobe.
Winkle's was one of those stores where a shirtless man could indeed buy a gallon of milk, some bread, peanut butter and other goods to keep body and soul together. So it was that, when on their way to work early one morning, they saw Nat Winkle's truck under an underpass, they pulled their pedicabs over and asked, “heya, Natty, sup?”
Nathaniel Winkle, technically the eighth, called Natty to distinguish him from his father, who went by the moniker Nat-fish (neither brother had yet had the time and temerity to ask regarding this.)
“Damn hammer.” Natty was somewhat sooty and looked at them from behind his thick round glasses. His white deli coat showed some stress from being on the ground.
Joe knelt and looked. “Wow, you don't see that every day.” There was claw hammer that had impaled the right rear tire of the Winklemobile.
“It's like I am cursed. You can't imagine what it is like!” The younger Winkle exclaimed.
“You might be surprised,” Joe replied quietly.
Cut to Commercial: The Rhinecliff Hotel. http://www.therhinecliff.com/index.html So good!
Natty spread his hands in exasperation. “No matter where, no matter what, it is always a hammer.”
Pragmatic, Guy said, “have a jack? We can help you change the tire.” He peeked under the truck for the spare, “You have a flat spare.” He looked at Joe, “There is another hammer in it.”
“No way,” Joe’s voice was hushed.
“Way,” Guy nodded, truth being stranger than fiction.
Joe hunkered to look under the truck, “Look at that!'
“Hammer.” Natty sighed.
“No problem,” Guy said, “hop in the cab, and we'll take you to pick up a tire and bring you back.”
“First we should push you out from in the underpass, you can't believe how unsafe...” He didn't even get the words out when they heard a squeal of tires and crunching from above themselves! Down poured a familiar smelling golden liquid. On the other side of the underpass a sound like hail, or beads echoed.
“Even in the face of disaster, life can be all beer and skittles!” Natty stated and then shouted, “ow!” As a hammer dislodged from the I beam above them and landed on his foot.
06 June, 2011
Tonight's episode: Life without Howie.
Starring: Matt Bomer as Guy Handsome, Jared Leto as Joe Handsome and Special Guest Star Rosario Dawson as the Goddess Pele.
Guest Star: Kelly Hu as Master Mi'na'kee
The sudden and unexplained absence of Uncle Howard put the brothers into the doldrums for many days.
Even quoting wonderful figures like, “Did you know one of the largest ever Lu'au was hosted by Kamehameha III in 1847. The list of foods prepared included 271 hogs, 482 large calabashes of poi, 3,125 salt fish, 1,820 fresh fish, 2,245 coconuts, 4,000 taro plants and numerous other delicacies. King Kalakaua, who was known as the ‘Merry Monarch’ for his love of parties and dance, invited over 1500 guests to his 50th birthday luau. They were fed in shifts of 500!” Didn't cheer Joe up.
Finding out that Kaz Kaiser's unitard during a recent race in Seattle had left him in-bare-assed, didn't cheer up Guy. Well, okay, yes it did– but not for long. (That should have been good for at least a week.)
Even the Madams Soo mentioned how things seemed a whole third less wonderful with Howard gone.
Of course there was lots of work to be done, making up for hours missed at being pedi-cabbies while they did fun stuff with Uncle Howie.
But it came to a head when Guy walked in and saw a glazed-like-a-donut Joe about to put on a shirt! “Are you crazy? What are you doing?” He cried aloud.
Joe froze and looked at the khaki colored four pocket safari shirt in his hands. He had even ironed it! “I... I don't know what got into me!” He stammered the words and placed the shirt onto a hanger. “I guess I was feeling... normal.”
Normal. The word hung there in the air like a pall. Normal. It seemed like forever since their lives had been that way, that 9 to 5 way.
“Oh, Joe,” Guy said slowly shaking his head in horror, “We need an intervention.”
Cut to Commercial: Serynzia electronic music! You can hear it here: http://bit.ly/2voHJe
They rode to the yellow and blue sign that said: Chakra Alignment.
Soon the brothers found themselves in a pergola covered garden with babbling water fountains and chimes of lun.
Master Mi'na'kee was facing them, her hands folded in greeting and she looked upon them and saw that their chakras were indeed wildly misaligned. “I can see that the earth is pulling you in many ways at once,” She said circling them. “We will need both sound and hand treatments to realign your pathways.”
Guy and Joe seated themselves, and attempted to relax.
“In the Light of the Creator...We See Only Love!” Master Mi'na'kee struck a tuning fork upon her elbow and the sound thrummed through the garden, harmonizing with some of the chimes and dissonizing with others. She brought her hands forward...
“Did I fall asleep?” Guy asked, suddenly noticing that garden was silent, “I saw myself in a place where everything tasted wonderful and yet it was all less filling.”
“Did we fall asleep?” Joe asked, seeing that the sun was much lower on the horizon, “I saw myself in a place where I could actually taste the rainbow.”
“You were wrapped in the cocoon of golden healing,” Master Mi'na'kee told them. “Your waking sleep gave you the key.”
After they bowed to the Master, (who waived her fee at this time, because the Handsome brothers had agreed that she could use photos of them in her garden on both her website and her brochures,) the brothers rode home.
They had much to contemplate.
Guest Star: Kelly Hu as Master Mi'na'kee
The sudden and unexplained absence of Uncle Howard put the brothers into the doldrums for many days.
Even quoting wonderful figures like, “Did you know one of the largest ever Lu'au was hosted by Kamehameha III in 1847. The list of foods prepared included 271 hogs, 482 large calabashes of poi, 3,125 salt fish, 1,820 fresh fish, 2,245 coconuts, 4,000 taro plants and numerous other delicacies. King Kalakaua, who was known as the ‘Merry Monarch’ for his love of parties and dance, invited over 1500 guests to his 50th birthday luau. They were fed in shifts of 500!” Didn't cheer Joe up.
Finding out that Kaz Kaiser's unitard during a recent race in Seattle had left him in-bare-assed, didn't cheer up Guy. Well, okay, yes it did– but not for long. (That should have been good for at least a week.)
Even the Madams Soo mentioned how things seemed a whole third less wonderful with Howard gone.
Of course there was lots of work to be done, making up for hours missed at being pedi-cabbies while they did fun stuff with Uncle Howie.
But it came to a head when Guy walked in and saw a glazed-like-a-donut Joe about to put on a shirt! “Are you crazy? What are you doing?” He cried aloud.
Joe froze and looked at the khaki colored four pocket safari shirt in his hands. He had even ironed it! “I... I don't know what got into me!” He stammered the words and placed the shirt onto a hanger. “I guess I was feeling... normal.”
Normal. The word hung there in the air like a pall. Normal. It seemed like forever since their lives had been that way, that 9 to 5 way.
“Oh, Joe,” Guy said slowly shaking his head in horror, “We need an intervention.”
Cut to Commercial: Serynzia electronic music! You can hear it here: http://bit.ly/2voHJe
They rode to the yellow and blue sign that said: Chakra Alignment.
Soon the brothers found themselves in a pergola covered garden with babbling water fountains and chimes of lun.
Master Mi'na'kee was facing them, her hands folded in greeting and she looked upon them and saw that their chakras were indeed wildly misaligned. “I can see that the earth is pulling you in many ways at once,” She said circling them. “We will need both sound and hand treatments to realign your pathways.”
Guy and Joe seated themselves, and attempted to relax.
“In the Light of the Creator...We See Only Love!” Master Mi'na'kee struck a tuning fork upon her elbow and the sound thrummed through the garden, harmonizing with some of the chimes and dissonizing with others. She brought her hands forward...
“Did I fall asleep?” Guy asked, suddenly noticing that garden was silent, “I saw myself in a place where everything tasted wonderful and yet it was all less filling.”
“Did we fall asleep?” Joe asked, seeing that the sun was much lower on the horizon, “I saw myself in a place where I could actually taste the rainbow.”
“You were wrapped in the cocoon of golden healing,” Master Mi'na'kee told them. “Your waking sleep gave you the key.”
After they bowed to the Master, (who waived her fee at this time, because the Handsome brothers had agreed that she could use photos of them in her garden on both her website and her brochures,) the brothers rode home.
They had much to contemplate.
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